This is my commandment: love one another as I love you…You are my friends if you do what I command you.” (John 15:12,14)
I have to admit the words “if you do what I command you” have always struck me as somewhat “off.” These words come in the middle of a long talk Jesus is giving the Apostles. It occurs after the conclusion of the Last Supper but before the events at the Garden of Gethsemane where Jesus is arrested and begins the Passion. Is Jesus’ love and friendship going to be conditional or provisional in some way? Does this mean the statement “Jesus loves us no matter what” has some serious limits somewhere in the small print?
There is something huge being played out that gives context to Jesus’ words. Jesus is offering a relationship far deeper than that of a master-servant. He calls His disciples “friends”, not just followers or servants. This is radical —friendship with the Son of God is possible. But this friendship is not casual or superficial. It’s grounded in obedience to His commands, which center around love (John 15:12 – “Love one another as I have loved you”).
Maybe, like me, you sometimes hear this as conditional: “I’ll be your friend only if you obey.” But the long arc of Jesus’ teaching and his mission shows that He is not setting a bar they must clear to earn His friendship. Rather obedience is the evidence of that friendship. It is the fruit of abiding in the love of Jesus. Friendship leads us into His way, following His words and actions. We may not always understand, but we trust our friend. This walk with Jesus naturally leads to transformation so that we want to obey Him..
St. Paul talks about the obedience of faith in Letter to the Romans. It is a phrase that reflects the covenantal nature of love. Biblical love is covenantal, not just emotional. Jesus is inviting His disciples (and us) into a relationship that mirrors His relationship with the Father—a relationship marked by love and shared purpose. His command is not a burdensome law, but a calling to live in the fullness of divine love.
It is this obedience of faith that echoes a reading earlier this week: the parable of the Vine and the Branches. The goal is to remain in Jesus and bear good fruit. A passive faith that shows no evidence of a transformation is not what Jesus means when He says “love one another as I love you.” It is about love one another sacrificially; always seeking the good for the other.
John 15:14 is not about Jesus setting conditions for His affection. It’s about revealing the nature of true friendship with Him—a relationship of intimacy, loyalty, and obedience. To be Jesus’ friend is to walk in His love, listen to His voice, and live His way.
Image credit: Duccio di Buoninsegna (1255–1319), “Jesus taking leave of his Apostles,” ca. 1310 | Panel 4 of the Maestro, Museo dell’Opera del Duomo, Siena | Public Domain